Queen - It's A Hard Life

Well, it's an old sappy, emo song everyone can relate to once in a while...
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Queen - It's A Hard Life

Words and music by Freddie Mercury

I don't want my freedom
There's no reason for living with a broken heart

This is a tricky situation
I've only got myself to blame
It's just a simple fact of life
It can happen to anyone

You win - you lose
It's a chance you have to take with love
Oh yeah - I fell in love
And now you say it's over and I'm falling apart

It's a hard life
To be true lovers together
To love and live forever in each others hearts
It's a long hard fight
To learn to care for each other
To trust in one another right from the start
When you're in love

I try and mend the broken pieces
I try to fight back the tears
They say it's just a state of mind
But it happens to everyone

How it hurts - deep inside
When your love has cut you down to size
Life is tough - on your own
Now I'm waiting for something to fall from the skies
And I'm waiting for love

Yes it's a hard life
Two lovers together
To love and live forever in each others hearts
It's a long hard fight
To learn to care for each other
To trust in one another - right from the start
When you're in love

Yes it's a hard life
In a world that's filled with sorrow
There are people searching for love in ev'ry way
It's a long hard fight
But I'll always live for tomorrow
I'll look back on myself and say I did it for love
Yes I did it for love - for love - oh I did it for love

A Clown's Life

Cry as you might... You'll still hear the laughter, for He cannot differentiate your joy from your cries.

The life of a clown is full of mockeries. The show will be over in no time...

Rainy days and Mondays...

Last night I had a dream... I dreamt that I was led into a church by my partner (I don't know the identity though. The face was "blurred"), where my friends and family were gathered. Instead of joining the congregation, I was led to a room where a beautiful wedding gown sat in the middle of it and my partner turned to me and said, "Surprise?"

Surprised, indeed! I was jolted awake abruptly and got up, only to realise that I'm extremely late for work again. Half cursing myself for ignoring the alarm clocks and half curious to find out how the dream would actually end, I started another MONDAY.

I got to the office, switch on my computer, read my emails and continue the dreaded project I am on. Somehow, I wanted the dream to be intepretated so this is what I found out based on the keywords, "Walking into your own wedding"

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Walking

To dream that you are walking with ease, represents the way you are moving through life and progress toward your goals. Consider your destination.

To dream that you have difficulties walking, indicates that you are reluctant and hesitant in proceeding forward in some situation. You may also be trying to distance yourself from certain life experiences. The difficulty in walking is a reflection of your current situation and the obstacles that you are experiencing.

Wedding

To see a wedding in your dream, symbolizes a new beginning or transition in your current life. Dreams involving weddings are often negative and highlight some anxiety or fear. It often refers to feelings of bitterness, sorrow, or death. Alternatively, wedding dreams reflect your issues about commitment and independence.

To dream that you are getting married to your current spouse again, represents your wedded bliss and happiness. It highlights your strong commitment to each other. It may also signify a new phase (such as parenthood) that you are entering in your life.

To dream that you are planning your own wedding to someone you never met, is a metaphor symbolizing the union of your masculine and feminine side. It represents a transitional phase where you are seeking some sort of balance between your aggressive side and emotional side.

If you are getting married and have dreams of your pending wedding, then it highlights the stress of organizing a wedding. Conflicts over wedding details, tension with family and in-laws, fear of commitment, and loss of independence may all cause wedding anxiety dreams. Research has shown that up to 40% of brides and grooms have dreams about their ceremony and things going perfectly.


Wedding Dress

To wear a wedding dress in your dream, indicates that you are evaluating and assessing your personal relationship.

To see someone else wearing a wedding dress, suggests that you are feeling inferior or unworthy.
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How to interprete the dream? Making a guess... It's not exactly a good omen.

This explains my emotion woes

MY MARS+VENUS MATCH
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Mars: aries
Venus: aries

You've got a fiery temper — but once it burns out, you're sweet again. You're impatient and impulsive, so your lovers must be quick, quick, quick with their minds, actions and affections.

Your Mars is in aries You're unbelievably forthright — independent, impulsive and prone to bursts of fury. Since you crave action, you don't always consider long-term issues when starting a relationship. Your partnerships are brief but incredibly passionate — you want who you want in the moment.

Your Venus is in aries You love attention — not just for your daring acts, but simply for who you are. You aren't possessive or jealous. However, you do insist on being the top priority in your mate's life, even if the relationship is brief. Independence, power and lust will always be important in your partnerships.
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HIS MARS+VENUS MATCH
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Mars: pisces
Venus: pisces

You're the Zen master of the zodiac — tough but mysterious. Nothing's too good for your lover, but think of yourself occasionally. It isn't selfish to take care of yourself.

Your Mars is in pisces Nothing is too good for your lover. You'll throw everything away for an unrequited love and never regret it. Passion is your strongest suit, but you do know when to back away from an ill fit. A true romantic, your every action is colored by emotion. An intellectual mate is your best chance for balance.

Your Venus is in pisces Unimpressed by the real world, you like magic and mystery in your life. You believe in soul mates, love at first sight and happily ever after. You've got an amazing depth of feeling, but often forget to guard your tender heart. Since you crave companionship, beware of becoming overly dependent on an uncaring mate.
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The predictions are pretty accurate. See the difference? Perhaps I'm really not worthy of his love.

You can get your MARS + VENUS MATCH
here

The grave of LOVE

Have you ever look at your parents' relationship and secretly tell yourself that you will never allow your future marriage to turn out the same way as your parents'? I have... In fact, I have been constantly taking pointers, what to avoid, what to do, etc. Actually I bet my mom did the same thing when she was my age but things still turned out the way it did. So I guess when my time comes, history will gladly repeats itself?

So what usually happens?

Boy meets girl and falls in love. The "wonderful" courtship starts. After a period of time, they decided to get married for whatsoever reasons (maternity instinct, wedlock, housing grant, pressure from parents, etc). Happy honeymoon follows, and with a regular sex life, they bore off-springs. Then the finger pointing starts. The problem ranges from, who to pay for various bills to how to split the house work. This usually ends up in quarrels, occasional wailing, threats to commit sucide or divorce, a big tight slap across the face and eventually... sleeping seperately. Give cold shoulder to each other for the next few days, then have make-up sex. Everything is back to normal again... Well, at least until the next fight.

No wonder they said that Marriage marks the grave of Love.

The Pussy's sweet vengence...

Ever wonder why some people adore cats? One owner told me that cats are easy to maintain and they will only come to you when they need food and some TLC. So in that sense, cats are considered smarter as compared to dogs. Why? Cause they don't pledge their loyalty to anyone. And they don't have to do stupid tricks to get treats. All they have to do is to purr, stare up with their big round eyes and rub their furry heads against you to hint that it's time to give them their basic needs.

So what happens to the neglected pet locked out by her owner? Simple, she just try to get whatever she needs from her owner's neighbours! My neighbour's cat apparently lacks alot of loving and it yearns for affection desperately. Every time I walked along the corridor (kitty's territory) she'll leap out from behind the flower pots and sprawl out her body to dominate the walkway. When I tried to walk pass her, she'll take the opportunity to rub her head against my feet! It's so annoying. Plus the missing patches of fur on her body makes it looks as if she has infection or something. So I tried my best to ignore her.

I guess she noticed that too (smart kitty). She changed her strategy. This is what she did. The moment she sensed that i'm out of the lift, she ran all the way to the lift and follow me. I have no choice by to stroke her a bit. She utterly enjoyed it as she twirled across the corridor. Until... She decided that she had enough. She turned around and bit me on my calf. Afterwhich, it continue to stare at me with that "har! I still have the last laugh" look... Ergh!!! I was so annoyed! I wanted to step on her tail!!! (nah.. I wouldn't do that.. Just words of angst)She has just crossed my line... and I will never ever touch her again!!! Purr off you pussy!!!

Doodle - Starry Eyed Surprise

Doodle - Starry Eyed Surprise
Originally uploaded by ECID*NAC.

Inspired by "Starry Eyed Surprise" - DJ Paul Oakenfold

Doodle - Blue

Doodle - Blue
Originally uploaded by ECID*NAC.

Erh... This turned out horrible!!! She looks like a tranny right? I hope the next artwork will turn out better. :P

Doodle - Purple

Doodle - Purple
Originally uploaded by ECID*NAC.

It has been a long while since I last doodle. I was thinking of doing a series based on colours. Well, here's the first.

Happy 1st year anniversary to the survivor

Today marks my 1st year in the Shenton Way Torture House. And on this day, I submitted my resignation letter. There can't be a better way to mark this anniversary...

I shall spare you guys the complaints. But as a word of caution. Please do not work in the Shenton Way Torture House, which is located at 78 Shenton Way. I can't specifically tell you where it is. I can roughly tell you that they are dealing with IT, and their company name is super cheesy which bare resemblence to the alias name I gave them.

All the best to myself! *Pat my own shoulder*

Finally, our very GENEROUS boss have approved our plead for namecards.

Balls to you, ViVi.... For being the cheapskate you are and refusing to pay your "part-timer" in time of need. Karma will catch up with you... eventually...

Melt down.

I'm melting down... Fast... I don't know how much longer can I be optimistic especially when failures kept coming your way. For one I know. I have failed as a designer. My designs are cliche, unattractive as often criticized. Someone hinted that my review at the end of the year ain't gonna be good. I'm not a good worker though I'm really trying my very best to be one. I have bloody tight deadlines at work and I have been working far too much OT. I just had a heated arguement with my superior yesterday (there goes the review!). My job hunt went in no avail and I have absolutely no idea what I want to do with my life in future. Cause everytime I made a plan, there'll bound to be cock-ups and eventually leads to the big failure. So tell me, how many times can you tell yourself that you believe in yourself when you failed time after time?

Plus, the hectic schedule is taking a toll on my personal life. My pile of laundry is overflowing the basket and as usual, my room is in a mess. And it has been 4 days since I last saw my bro at home.

For all that, I'm tired. I'm frustrated. And I'm depressed. I wished I have the courage to end my life now and it didn't have to be a sin.

I told people that I'm cruising on stress, as if I can really handle it well. But I don't... 'cause I'm human too...

Lemmiwinks broke her leg :(

Lemmiwinks really has a hard life with me, her utterly irresponsible owner. She nearly drowned 9 months ago while I tried to bath her.

Guess what... I was changing her bedding just now and I realised Lemmi was limping. I thought she had a tumour or something under her belly but I dispelled the thought as soon as I see that her right hind leg was generally inactive. I froze momentarily, and silently examined her moves. So I pick her up (she never let me hold her) and surprisingly, she was tamed enough for me to transfer her to a transparent plastic tank. Afterwhich, I looked under the plastic tank to check out what causes her to limp.

To my horror, she has indeed broken her leg. It was so bad that the bone was protuding out of her fur and she is just running across the tank as usual. I have absolutely no idea how she got the fracture and it is my fault that I didn't discover it earlier. I'm really lost now. I'm not sure if I should bring her to a vet. It's too late to treat the fracture now and I'm afraid that the vet will suggest to put her to sleep. With that, the guilt of my neligence kicked in and somehow, the thought of bringing Lemmi and Cream to the SPCA crossed my mind. I really want to slap myself for being such bummer. But no. No SPCA for them. As cheesy as it may sound, "Pets are for life". Now that Lemmi has to live the rest of her life with the handicap, I'll care for her till she breath her last.

And one more thing. I promised myself that I'm not going to keep any pets in future after these 2 fur balls. It's has really been heart breaking to see them sick, dying or hurt. Plus, I'm an utterly lousy excuse of a pet owner.

The story of the lost sheep

Every lost sheep needs to find a shepherd to be led back to its herd.

Me, the very lost sheep, has been going round the same pasture for some time now. The grass seems dry and unappetizing, but my shepherd has yet to find me. So I'll dwell for a little longer. The grass is, of course, greener on the other side of the hill. But it's an area which I have never ever thought of treading into. Now... this confused sheep is very much allured by the temptation yet rather afraid of the potential danger waiting at the other side of the hill. Will her shepherd actually be at there? Will there be big hungry wolves roaming (after all, the grass looks rather ungrazed)? Will she be more lost then she did before? Or perhaps she'll find a new herd to join?

The sheep has decided. She'll go over to the other side, once the dry and unappetizing grass runs out. Baaaaaa..... :)

Straight from the heart...

Recently there has been so much positive energy around me, it's hard for me to be depress any longer. I'm grateful for those who showered loads of encouragement upon me. Because you guys believed in me, I have to push myself to work harder and start believing in myself. Thanks for the helping hand, one and all, for pulling me out of troubled waters. I have yet to succeed. But when I do, your kind words will not be forgotten cause you guys will always be kept close to my heart...

Tear-stained pillow...

Why do my tears flow freely as I think of him? I'm such a wreck without him. But we can't bring ourselves to live with each other. I am not even sure if i'm doing the best for the both of us. He doesn't understand why I am doing this. It seems like he is taking it easy, like nothing ever happened.

Our 4 years... filled with bits of bitterness and sweet. We're always have the best intentions for each other, just that we can't compromise. He can't stand me being "ms jerkyl and hyde", I can't stand the ways he push his opinions onto me. We are constantly going against each other. I know we could go on, till we reach the destination we set in the beginning. But I can foresee it'll be tough to keep the relationship together due to our differences.

It is painful. Really painful. But I guess it'll be best for the both of us...

For all the wrong reasons.

A long lost friend of mine confided in me recently. He has been facing relationship problems for 2 years now. The tricky part is that, he's married. He said that he has lost feelings for his wife because her attitude, behavior, etc.
His list of woes included: the wife being
- not understanding
- over-suspicious
- over-sensitive
- dictating
- a control freak
These are the common complaints men have on their missus. Personally, I feel that his marriage started on the wrong foot.

It boils down to the reason, why do couples even get married? Of course, the morally-correct and stereo-typical reason is that these couples do want to spend the rest of their lives together lovingly, as mentioned in almost all fairy tales as the “happily ever after” kind of ending. However, for my friend, his core reason is all different. His is out of filial piety. His father was diagnosed with cancer and wished to see him “settled down” before he passed on. So my friend, hastily got a decent girl, dated her for less than a year before marrying her. He told me that he is sacrificing his happiness to fulfill his father’s death wish and he will do his duty as a good husband. Frankly, to me, that’s definitely not the right reason to get married.

I have already given up in talking him into counseling. He is just waiting for his wife to give up on the marriage. It’s another sad ending, another one to add up to the already rising statistics.

I am the walrus...

Good o' Beatles of the psychedelic era. Their lyrics colourful, whimsical yet perplex. They saw Lucy in the sky, met The Nowhere Man, travelled in the Yellow Submarine and rescued Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band from the evil Meanies. Perhaps life open up a new perspective once you befriend Booze and Narcotics. Well, anyway, I have just put up one of the Beatles' numbers (with the queerest lyrics I have ever heard) on my blog. I figure, it has many many puns intended, hmmm... so how or rather...


I Am The Walrus - The Beatles

I am he as you are he as you are me and we are all together.
See how they run like pigs from a gun, see how they fly.
I'm crying.

Sitting on a cornflake, waiting for the van to come.
Corporation tee-shirt, stupid bloody Tuesday.
Man, you been a naughty boy, you let your face grow long.
I am the eggman, they are the eggmen.
I am the walrus, goo goo g'joob.

Mister City Policeman sitting
Pretty little policemen in a row.
See how they fly like Lucy in the Sky, see how they run.
I'm crying, I'm crying.
I'm crying, I'm crying.

Yellow matter custard, dripping from a dead dog's eye.
Crabalocker fishwife, pornographic priestess,
Boy, you been a naughty girl you let your knickers down.
I am the eggman, they are the eggmen.
I am the walrus, goo goo g'joob.

Sitting in an English garden waiting for the sun.
If the sun don't come, you get a tan
From standing in the English rain.
I am the eggman, they are the eggmen.
I am the walrus, goo goo g'joob g'goo goo g'joob.

Expert textpert choking smokers,
Don't you thing the joker laughs at you?
See how they smile like pigs in a sty,
See how they snied.
I'm crying.

Semolina pilchard, climbing up the Eiffel Tower.
Elementary penguin singing Hari Krishna.
Man, you should have seen them kicking Edgar Allan Poe.
I am the eggman, they are the eggmen.
I am the walrus, goo goo g'joob g'goo goo g'joob.
Goo goo g'joob g'goo goo g'joob g'goo.

Let tomorrow worry for itself...

Phew! I've finally completed all my "tasks". My room is in an utterly outrageous state of mess (what's new?). Hmmph.. I wish that was the only thing that's messed up right now (Sigh. Sigh. Sigh.). Well, anyway, I spend the whole night wrapping pressie for one of my dearest colleague, Pearlyn, who will be leaving my company real soon.

Some of my friends asked, "Wah! How many farewell parties this month huh?". Seriously, I have already stopped counting how many farewell parties/ dinner/ lunch/ gathering I have attended even since I got recruited into the Shenton Way Torture House. After all, numbers are just statistics.

So, when's my turn to ORD from the Torture House? Well, until I find another slave-driver who can offer me better welfare or at least until I find my direction out of this place. However, this is not one of the most pressing problems I'm facing right now.

The situation I'm in requires me to "subtly warn" aka "urge" one of my more junior colleague to change her working attitude. And of course, it wasn't my idea... Yet, I have to kill some few million brain-cells to think about how to put the message to her without straining our working relationship (and also budding friendship) and also to consider if she will take the comments negatively. So I have decided to let out the "warning" little by little. The aftermath is always ugly lah. She seemed quite affected by it. Who wouldn't be, right? :(

Since now i'm just left with 2 hours to sleep before I head down for work, I'm contemplating should I even sleep. My brain is zoning out this very minute... I... I... I just wanna let tomorrow worry for itself....... ZZZzzz............ *snores* (I bet the next thing I know, I'll be very very very very late for work) :P

Black boy's poem

When I born, I Black,
When I grow up, I Black,
When I go in Sun, I Black,
When I scared, I Black,

When I sick, I Black,

And when I die, I still black..



And you White fella,.....

When you born, you Pink,
When you grow up, you White,
When you go in Sun, you Red,
When you cold, you Blue,
When you scared, you Yellow,
When you sick, you Green,
And when you die, you Gray..

And you call me Colored ??

Once a bastard, always a bastard.

Well, Happy birthday. And I still think you are a bastard.

So long. Farewell.

It has come the time when I have to bid farewell to my work buddy, Zhiwei, as he moves on to pursue further studies. I left the farewell dinner with mixed feelings. Hmmm... Perhaps a little sad. Afterall, he is quite a humourous guy. I guess it's just weird not having someone to "talk cock" with when the work stress builds up. Plus, I think he's about the only person who will give me a "morning call" religiously every weekday morning just to make sure that I'm not too late for work (but often I still can't resist the temptation of my bed and end up falling back to sleep). I think we make a great team cause he has such positive work attitude that spurs me to improve one design after another. And since he is the one shouldering more work load, I guess the baton will be passed down to me soon. The pressure is on now that I'm considered the more "senior" designer. Gee... I have never been a "senior" in any company before and it really feels so weird considering that I have only work in this company for a mere 9 months. My managers had already prompt me on improving my work attitude and also hinting the magnitude of the work load to come. I hope I won't be tearing my hair out or else I'll just end up balding then I'll look even uglier than how I already am. :( *Fingers crossed*

Oh! On a happier note, today Jordan and I went to St Gregory Spa. It was our first Spa experience and we enjoyed it tremendously! Wah damn shiok! They gave us facial and full body massage. We even get to use the jacuzzi and steam room! And for once, I really feel damn like a VIP. But of course, VIP treatment and service comes with a relatively hefty price. When I saw the bill, my eyes nearly pop out from their sockets! haha. It's ok lah. Worth the money what. Who can resist the high life man? So what should I do? Be a slave to $ so as to afford this kind of "luxury" loh. :(

Pastel, my hamster

The bond between pets and their owners is just so ambiguous. People usually own a pet for companionship and in turn, grew attached to them. Animals, on the other hand, just simply grew dependent on their owners for food, shelter and a little bit of TLC. As we, humans, are prone to emotional set backs, we tend to grieve over our pet's death, or in my case, my pet's impending death. Seeing her so frail and weak, leaves me heart broken every time I locate her in her cage. Her hair count is depleting and she can bearly open her eyes. She can't even eat her food properly without occasionally tumbling backwards.

So why am I so attached to her? Because, she is my first hamster. I adopted her about 1 1/2 years ago from my friend, Kel. He is the one who discovered her abandoned by the road side with her cage opened, vulnerable to attacks from cats in the neighbourhood. Her previous owner didn't really take good care of her cause Kel found Ritz biscuit in her food bowl, dirty bedding and she was pretty much ungroomed. So Kel rescued her, feed her proper hamster food and clean her up. But he can't adopt her since he already had quite a few hamsters himself. He then asked if I wanna keep her and I agreed. When Airene and I saw her, we decided to call her "Pastel" due to her light golden fur. Since then, she has been residing in my room. She never fights back, always allow me to hold and stroke her. She's quite an acrobat too. Overtime, I grew real fond of her. And now that her days are numbered, I am left low-spirited. I can't believe she won't be with me any much longer.

Though I feel silly writing all these, I just want to let go of some sorrow in my heart. Pardon me.

De-Sigh-ner

Having attended the 2006 NAFA Degree Graduation show with my ex-classmates recently, it reminds me that it has well been a year since mine own. Looking at those eager unfamiliar faces of this year's cohort, I wonder how would their careers turn out to be. One year ago, there I was, so full of hope, thinking of all the endless opportunities and career advancement I'll get with my qualifications. Before long, I found out that, it takes alot more than just qualifications to secure a job.

Designers lead a hard life. First, they have got to possess an impressive portfolio and, of course, have relavant work experiences to secure a job. To add icing on the cake, some award certificates, preferably those with a "Crowbar" on it. So what do other fresh grads do if they have no experience and no award to boot? Well, there are companies that are kind enough to hire fresh grads. But they are not willing to pay (to be accurate, the starting pay is usually about 1.2k - 1.5k). The fresh grads will have no choice but to accept it since they are desperate for some experience and commercialise work to top-up their portfolio (cause in our line, no employer really gives a damn about school projects). There designers are required to work long hours, usually with no Over-Time pay, deal with plenty of rejections/ criticism and are required to produce top-notch work.

When the designer is sick and tired of the company's exploitation, he decides to move on. And obviously the figure of the expected salary will rise a bar since now he has some experience and commercialise work in his portfolio. However, the companies in Singapore are so conditioned to the "cheap price" they pay for designers that they assume that they can always hire someone for the same low price. The mentality is "I would rather hire a fresh grad for a lower price than to increase your pay. It's up to you if you wanna leave. Cause designers are so easily available. If not, I'll just engage a freelancer."

So by this time, what do the experience designers do? I thought of a few probabilities:

1) Work even harder and strive to be a Creative Director (It'll usually be harder if you are not blessed with blonde hair, blue eyes or speak with an accent)
2) Specialize in an art/design skill and polish it to perfection. Then apply to be a lecturer in some art colleges. (That depends on what kind of skill-sets are in demand)
3) Consider making a career switch if you are money-minded. Cause the design line is not where the money is.
4) Continue to endure the exploitation. By the time you are 35, you will realised that you are heading nowhere except that your body is growing sideways and your eyebags are comparable to those of a Bubble Eye goldfish. Perhaps even face retrenchment to make way for new blood.

Up till date, I haven't met any local designers who are above 35. Presumably, designer's career life-span will no last over 35 years of age. Considering the fact that 30s is the prime time in any adult's life (think starting a family, buying a HDB flat and ideally owning a car), it will not a good time to be out of job. By then, the "veteran" of design would have been considered useless and it will be too late to start carving a career in a different field.

All in all, I don't see the situation changing for the better anytime soon. Hence, I'm so utterly caught in a dilemma to give up or not to. I know there are others like me too. If only we can unite, speak up for ourselves and protect our fellow "comrades" (especially freelancers) from unreasonable abuse.

That's just my naiveness. It's not possible. We are all selfish cowards in our own right.

The Peanuts vs Carrots election

To be frank, I am a little disappointed at the issues raised at the election rallies. The PAP didn't pin-point the exact problems that we (read average joes and janes) faced but tempted us with, as the media phrased it, "dangling carrots" (aka upgradings). The Opposition parties (SDA, SDP, WP) voiced out concerns that, I must admit, strikes a chord in my heart.

However, the future looks bleak with the Opposition and I have my reserves about their promises. Why? From my point of view, it would be the lack of resources. So with insufficient resources, how are they going to improve our lives? But then again, it brings me to another point. Why are funds distributed unevenly between the parties? Don't they have a common pool of funds that they can utilise based on the size of their constituencies? The PAP can promise residents living in Hougang up to $100,000,000 worth of up-grading programmes. And yes. That's alot alot of money. Have anyone ever thought about if this sum of money is well-spent for up-grading purposes? Wouldn't it be better if that money is used to subsidise transport costs and maybe provide a bit of relief for the needy amongst our fellow Singaporeans? Well for that cause, I guess it'll be alright for the majority of us not to have revamped lift-landings or beautiful landscape gardens. Or to some, maybe not. After all, Singaporeans are quite well-known for being practical (these days, even foreigners living here are influenced too).

All in all, I feel that the Election Campaigning period shouldn't be wasted on blowing minor issues out of proportions (NKF and Gomez episodes). Rather, the focus should be on how to be in-tune with matters at the grassroots and making policies that are beneficial to the society. I am heartened to find that they are finally moving on on the Gomez incident.

The media plays an important part in the election too. Some said they (the media) are biased. But I think otherwise. Most of the reports I read were not misleading. I mean, search your heart. Who doesn't want to look their best when the camera is pointing at them? And you don't get to see your MPs scrubbing your void deck floors everyday, do you? We wouldn't know what is Wayang until we fail to see results. Besides that, I must thank the gift of technology for helping voters like me access alternative views and highlights to the rallies. By the way, check out the
massive crowd at the Hougang field rally.

Okay. It's almost 6am now. And the poll centers will be opening its floodgates in about 2 hours time. I'm going to get some winks before I go down and mark that X on the polling card. Yup, I have made up my mind. I would love to reveal my choice but voting is secret. So sshhhh... By the way, dear voters, do go with your heart. Give the parties a run for their money.

(P/S: Btw, SDP got an interesting take on why the distribution of their newsletter got disrupted. FYI, it's not about the Peanuts)

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All the reasons you'll love your Mac. And maybe that's why Mac users are so cocky. Anyways, I'm so loving mine! :)

Uphill ride for the oppositions?

I was browsing through the CNA website and I saw this:

Clean sweep for PAP a likely outcome in this election?

Quote:
"Whether the new Parliament will be controlled totally by the ruling party, one thing is becoming sure. THIS ELECTION IS GOING TO BE A SAD STORY OF AN OPPOSITION THAT WORKED SO HARD BUT FAILED AT THAT FINAL WHISTLE."

And come Polling Day, whether my friend (PM Lee Hsien Loong) is proven right or wrong about a clean sweep by PAP, the Opposition is likely to return home dejected.

The sandstorm in our politics desert

Come Saturday, 06/05/06, is the General Election. Around my neighborhood, campaign banners have been put up, some parties more “kiasu” than the other. The media made endless reports on on-going rallies. Among them, many issues have been raised and, their solutions, promised to be fulfilled. Some claimed to dig skeletons out of their competitor’s closet, while others are just brewing storms in teacups. Well, during the election period, anything goes.

I wonder, what would first time voters, like myself, be concerned about?
Generally, my peers are considerably nonchalant about politics and are still un-interested in the election. Try posting them a question like, “What is the name of our Minister for Health?” The answer will most probably go “Erh… I don’t know.” “Which parties are contesting for your area?” “Eh… Not sure, but the logo is the one with the red circles and PAP loh.”

This is a phenomenon. I am no sociologist to judge if this ignorance is healthy to our country, but personally I feel that young Singaporeans should at least know a little about our country’s political background and culture before voting blindly. After all we are part of the One People, One Nation, One Singapore right?

Wonder Woman in training

Everything just went so wrong today! It's feels like I'm shouldering menhirs. It's my dad's birthday today. Bad enough that I can't make it on time for the dinner with my family. Worse, I'm being imprisoned in the Torture House till I'm done with "urgent" matters. In addition to that, I'm suppose to perform magic tonight by churning out revisions for my freelance project as well as complete my personal interactive portfolio. Yes, something big is happening tomorrow... It could be my chance to break free from the shackles of the Torture House. Better clasp my hands and pray hard. :P

How to make yourself blush in 10 steps?

Step 1: Accumulate bowels in your system for 2 days
Step 2: Invite a friend to the gym with you and suggest to attend a Pilate class
Step 3: Make sure your friend lay his mat near to yours
Step 4: Attempt to hold a potentially loud fart while warming up
Step 5: Tighten the your abdomens, rolling forward with your back on the floor, still holding the fart
Step 6: Roll back and relax abs, while uncontrollably let out a loud "toot"
Step 7: Look around to see if anyone noticed
Step 8: Your friend sniggered upon eye contact and eventually erupted into raucous laughter
Step 9: Noticed that the others in class bit their lips hard to repress their laughter
Step 10: With the whole class distracted, the instructor gave you a reproaching frown

Soccer Fever

soccer fever
Originally uploaded by ECID*NAC.

Hey hey... This is my first full-body illustration done solely on Photoshop. Btw, I'm not such a soccer fan lah. Just 'cos I'm doing the website for a local soccer fan club.

No... She not from Hogwarts.

Ah... The serenity of the night. The twinkling stars. The crescent moon. All contrasting against the backdrop of the dark dark sky. I sipped my tea and stared out of the window. The streets were randomly decorated with the headlights of vehicles cruising along. I took another sip of tea, gently massaged my temples and headed back to base: The Shenton Way Torture House.

The Witch stood akimbo at the door, tapping her feet impatiently awaitng my return. I sensed danger. The Witch hissed. I stood still. I could see her flapping fork tongue and ivory fangs. She did her dirty deed and flew off on her broom stick.

The venom cause much agony. But that has to be casted aside. Cause the show must go on. The show will go on.

But not for long.

Living a Scoorge life

"Am I missing out on the finer things in life?"

I have been reflecting. This question creeps quietly into my head recently. I am going breathless with the amount of work I have to cope, my personal financial woes each month, and the most taxing problem of all, relationships.

Over these 2 months, a series of occasions have passed: 3 birthdays (Jordan's, Bro's and mine), Valentine's Day, Chinese New Year, the Oasis concert. Birthdays are times to be thoughtful and sweet and considerate and all so sugar-spice-and-everything-nice to these important people in my life. But I have been such a bum, thinking that easy-does-it. I prepared no present, no proper planning of celebration, worst of all, no enthusiasm. I must be oblivious to how much they tried to mask their disappointment.

Then came the Oasis concert. Yet again, there I was. Nonchalant. While Liam was singing, tossing his tambourine into the audience crowd, I could only whine about stinky B.O., sweaty bodies and the swell forming on my little left toe from all that accidental stomping on my feet. But what I should be caring about is how much He is willing to sacrifice for us to go the concert, how much He wants me to enjoy the night with him, how happy I would be to see Oasis perform live…

However, the self-centered ME did not get my retribution when it was my birthday. Instead, I was showered with presents, nice surprises and luxurious indulgences. Jordan took me out on such an extravagant date. Better not mention how much he spent. Heh.., My bro actually brought me a present with his savings! Lindt, whom I totally forgot about her birthday this year, remembers mine. She couriers her present all the way to my office! Can you believe it? And I made all my dear Choppies waited on an empty stomach for hours. I foiled a nice dinner plan that they actually took effort to work out. They even bought be this really elegant costume jewelry set they know I cannot afford.

It’s not about how much the present cost. Nor is it about the aesthetics of gifts. It’s all about the warm and fuzzy feeling that is left within you. Now, that’s priceless!

Ever since my birthday, I felt guilt buzzing in my thoughts. Frankly, I don’t deserve these niceties, especially when I am not giving.

So tell me, am I turning into a lean, mean and cold work maniac? I pray not.

(P/S: Pictures featuring an Oasis concert hand-band, my very own customised hand-painted t-shirt and me with the very hand-some Jordan. :P)

Ang Bao many many, everyone!

I started today in a fairly happy mood. First of all, I'm early for work today (Yah, believe me! My colleagues thought they were hallucinating/ dreaming/ hynotised too! Gawd...). Since CNY is just around the corner, we wanted to amuse ourselves by blasting weird CNY music (Fusion of traditional and modern elements?) through our computer speakers, and laughed our heads off the moment the Or-Biang music transmit into our office air wave!

My boss, however, isn't really in the CNY mood (well, i think he's never in mood for anything). Probably no half-day or ang bao then. Sigh. Well, let it not dampen our spirits. Gong Xi Fa Cai everyone! Eat more pineapple tarts and bak kwa! Yummy Yum!

Feels like.. SCHOOL.. all over again.

It feels like a blast from the past. Eyelids heavy, impending headache, sore back, all the result of an overnight stay in the Shenton Way Torture Camp. I only managed to sleep fitfully on a highly uncomfortable make-shift bed (made up of 3 office chairs in a row). When I stared up at the ceiling made of white chip-wood board and long florescent light bulbs, only one thing came to my mind... It feels an awful lot like school all over again. Every DMD student (ex or current)is no stranger to those late nights, crazy datelines to meet and working over night in the Project Studio. Hmmm... Maybe it is only right for the school to prepare the students for the industry AKA the real world. I mean, just look at me now...

Anyway, the night's effort ain't fruitless. Here's the outcome.

The thing about friends...

I sometimes find I have too high an expection of myself. There are a million and one things I would like to achieve, to fulfill, to be dare to dream about. However, I am, sadly, an under-achiever. Or maybe I just lack the passion and drive to go all the way out to be what I want to be. I never have hit perfection, it's always the "Ok, pass can already" attitude. Yeah, I do feel like a loser sometimes. I can't seem to get anything right. From playing poor pool (for years now) to being an under-paid/ over-worked designer. I don't know my potential seriously. And I want to know. But I can't shed away that bloody "heck it" mindset that has been feasting on my inner self for the past god-knows-how-many donkey years.

However, there are a few things I'm proud of about myself. First on the list, my boyfriend. I think God has been kind to me in that sense. It's not easy to stick by someone through thick and thin, and through these years in our relationship, I realised I actually have a soulmate. It is indeed a blessing.

Secondly, my degree. It was the first time I am pleased with my result and I think I actually worked hard (did I?). I never thought I could do it, and I felt real good at the end of it eventhough I weren't the best.

Thirdly, my friends. They are the soft-spot in my life and I hold them really dear. However, to label someone as a "best friend" just seems rather immaturish to me these days. Don't get me wrong. I'm not an anti-social. I used to have "best friends" too. But what happened to them, I guess I vaguely know. Sometimes you don't know what to expect from a friend. At one point in time, you might be so fucking close, calling each other out everyday, hanging out whenever possible. You'll miss each other. There are endless topics to talk about, and before you knew it, it's day break. Your parents think that you both are homosexual. But then again, not all friendships are bound to last. Those which remain is what I wanna call "priceless". Those which fade did not really vanish totally too. I guess the distance just broaden, with work, with relationships, with different paths we take in life. It hurts. Why can't I have the "heck it" attitude in that? I tried. I failed. I felt my heart sank when my sms were left unanswered. I don't want to be disillusioned into thinking that we are still close when we are obviously not. Yes, I can be a prick sometimes. I guess it has something to do with my expections in them too. Or just maybe I am not such a good friend to them myself.

But hey, nothing in life is certain. Forgive me, I'm just whining.

MAD TV!

Do check out the classics VIDEOS on for slapstick spoofs and parodies. It cracks me up...

Mission accomplished!

My eyes are so groggy... Like the monitor in front of me is swirly. It's already time for me to head down to work. *Yawn* After 5 hours of experimenting, here's the new design.. I know the tag board looks funny. Cause it's all squeesh at the bottom due to miscalculation. Guess I'll alter it when I some other time.

NOW, I'll be heading down to TORTURE CAMP in Shenton Way...

Working on a new blog skin

Finally, I have got my lazy ass of the sofa and start working on my new blog skin design. I have been wanting to change the design for ages now. So tonight, under the influence of the cold chilly rainy night (yeah I know, I should be snuggling in bed under my comforter), I'm going to try to come out with something new. But I haven't have anything in mind. I'll have to meet the Z-monster tomorrow night... Ok.. Maybe later at work, if coffee doesn't perform its miracles.. haha..

Checking out the next dressing room...

This is the time of the year that I dread the most. The darn one month period before Lunar New Year. Beside the all-so-familiar awful Ching-chong LNY tunes blasting at every possible heartland shopping malls, shoppers are seeing RED everywhere, literally. Wearing red is such a cliche during LNY. Well, at least it is a good chance for retail stores to be bringing out their outdated stocks of whatever in red, maroon, pink, simply anything in the shade of red.

I seriously don't sense the joy of shopping pre-LNY. First of all, I don't like red or orange or maroon, ok, maybe pink and purple is alright. Secondly, I don't like the idea of forcing yourself to buy something. It's like a waste of my money spending on some clothes I won't be wearing very often (eg. the red cheong sam I bought last year). Thirdly, I am disgusted by the very nature of the female gender to out dress each other. You can see the cattiness in each of the ladies' eyes in the fitting room. They will peer over your mirror to check you out. If they think you look good, they will either pick the similar piece to try on or find another item that will outshine yours. Suddenly, the narrow aisle of the fitting area has transformed into a mini-runway. The ladies will be strutting up and down, in and out of the changing rooms, posing in front of the full length mirror, confronted by dilemmas, envy and confusion. And at the end of the day, they will still end up buying more or less the same design, in the few perceived "auspicious" colours. For example, I was queuing up to try on a pair of jeans at Mango. In front of me, I saw 3 ladies trying on identical knitted tops of different sizes. It looks as if they were buying uniforms or something.

Another part of the tradition leading to LNY, which I absolutely loathed, is: SPRING CLEANING! Friends who actually knows me are undeniably convinced that I am a mess. I lived in a "sty" with 3 rodent-like friends (my hamsters). And I actually like my room a little messy, which is in an intolerably unacceptable state to usher in the LNY. So I have to get my ass off the sofa, roll my sleeve up and wipe the dust off the shelves. And the worst part is to bear is... my parents' constant annoying nags...

So all in all, I must sum up that I am going to stay grumpy... Hmmm... At least until the Ang Bao money starts rolling in... haha... *_*

Memoirs of a geisha

Memoirs of a geisha
Originally uploaded by candice_dymphna_ng.

Never in film history has Asian chicks rock Hollywood on such a massive scale. Haha... Nah.. I'm just exaggerating.. But I think this flick is gonna make us Asian girls ooze extra sex appeal.

There's still exactly 2 more weeks till the film opens. And the anticipation is killing me. I hope the film will be as good as the paperback. It is one of my favourite stories. Though Zhang Zi Yi is the lead actress, somehow I find Gong Li is the one who actually captured my attention. Check out her look in this picture man. It just spells one word, "SEDUCTION".

So girls, to learn the art of seduction, the geisha way, go book a ticket.

Memoirs of a geisha open on 19 January 2006.

Cruella De Vil will enjoy seeing this...

Cruella De Vil will enjoy seeing this...
Originally uploaded by candice_dymphna_ng.

Whoever ever ever thinks that fur is beautiful? The cavemen donned it. But if given the knowledge to produce cotton, will they still wear fur? With Cruella De Vil as an exception, I bet the average Joe/ Jill like you and me won't find it appealing... Not after watching THIS!!!

*Not for obsessive animal lovers or the faint in the heart. Get the puke bags ready if you can't take gore and blood