Living a Scoorge life

"Am I missing out on the finer things in life?"

I have been reflecting. This question creeps quietly into my head recently. I am going breathless with the amount of work I have to cope, my personal financial woes each month, and the most taxing problem of all, relationships.

Over these 2 months, a series of occasions have passed: 3 birthdays (Jordan's, Bro's and mine), Valentine's Day, Chinese New Year, the Oasis concert. Birthdays are times to be thoughtful and sweet and considerate and all so sugar-spice-and-everything-nice to these important people in my life. But I have been such a bum, thinking that easy-does-it. I prepared no present, no proper planning of celebration, worst of all, no enthusiasm. I must be oblivious to how much they tried to mask their disappointment.

Then came the Oasis concert. Yet again, there I was. Nonchalant. While Liam was singing, tossing his tambourine into the audience crowd, I could only whine about stinky B.O., sweaty bodies and the swell forming on my little left toe from all that accidental stomping on my feet. But what I should be caring about is how much He is willing to sacrifice for us to go the concert, how much He wants me to enjoy the night with him, how happy I would be to see Oasis perform live…

However, the self-centered ME did not get my retribution when it was my birthday. Instead, I was showered with presents, nice surprises and luxurious indulgences. Jordan took me out on such an extravagant date. Better not mention how much he spent. Heh.., My bro actually brought me a present with his savings! Lindt, whom I totally forgot about her birthday this year, remembers mine. She couriers her present all the way to my office! Can you believe it? And I made all my dear Choppies waited on an empty stomach for hours. I foiled a nice dinner plan that they actually took effort to work out. They even bought be this really elegant costume jewelry set they know I cannot afford.

It’s not about how much the present cost. Nor is it about the aesthetics of gifts. It’s all about the warm and fuzzy feeling that is left within you. Now, that’s priceless!

Ever since my birthday, I felt guilt buzzing in my thoughts. Frankly, I don’t deserve these niceties, especially when I am not giving.

So tell me, am I turning into a lean, mean and cold work maniac? I pray not.

(P/S: Pictures featuring an Oasis concert hand-band, my very own customised hand-painted t-shirt and me with the very hand-some Jordan. :P)